Our friends and family are a lifelong lifeline. But sometimes relationships can be strained with the diagnosis of a chronic illness. The stress and feeling of complete hopelessness may not just influence you but also friends and family who struggle with seeing you suffer. Everyone reacts differently. Some may draw closer. Others may distance themselves during the journey. Those who pull away may pick fights or simply isolate without a word, even making up excuses to stay away. You may even do the same. It's not because of a lack of love or like, it's simply a coping mechanism. Realize that frequent faces may change. What's most important is to surround yourself with friends and family who support you and can promote mental well-being. Here are a few ways in which you can help strengthen relationships and persevere with P.A.D.:

• Take friends and family to appointments. Understanding your diagnosis, treatments, lifestyle modification goals, and limitations will help friends and family support you in the ways that are most beneficial.
• Include family and friends with goal setting. When they're a part of your goal-setting for critical lifestyle modifications, they're more likely to help you achieve them and feel a part of your success, versus taunt, tempt, and tease you while they enjoy what you can't.
• Be honest about interests and limitations. It's important to let family and friends know that you desire to participate in activities. Ask that they're patient with you as you may rest several times. Also, let them know it's OK to walk ahead and you'll catch up - that it's most important for you to simply be included and together.
• Own your moody moment. If you are in pain and it impacts your mood, say to others, "This pain is making me cranky or depressed. I need a moment. I do prefer to feel better, and when I'm ready to make that choice, here's what cheers me up even when I hurt ..."

Kym McNicholas

Founder

TheWayToMyHeart.org